National Treasure

For some people, achieving national treasure status might seem the pinnacle of their career.

However, I consider myself to still be in my prime - I have a great many things yet to achieve.

That is why I turned down a lucrative advertising contract for the series of British Marks & Spencer Christmas adverts - full of 'National Treasures'.

It seems that they were not happy with Mister Stephen Fry's pronunciation of the word 'mince' and were hoping to substitute myself.

"He is a good friend of mine and there is no way that I would involve myself in such shenanigans!" I told them "besides, I am not even British!".

"But everyone in Britain adores you!" came the reply. "It seems to me that hero's are two a penny in your country - unlike here at Homeward where I have truly earned the respect of my fellows!" was my somewhat waspish response.

I have, of course, agreed to appear in the Cheapman's Store Christmas campaign. After all he is my very good friend and fellow entrepreneur.

The campaign is based on the theme of the objects that make Christmas what it is...all I had to say is "a dozen large hams and a bucket of cocoa"

The next day a lorry load of hams and a large vat of cocoa were delivered to my very door!...how very kind of Cheapman.

Buy my Biographies in Great Britain here and here

Buy my Biographies in America here and here