Twitter Trial

This week has seen Hitmouse's dubious attempt to overturn his conviction of "menace" for making threats against me in a Twitter "joke".

The judge decided that his comment on the site "I am going to skewer that fat dictator!!" clearly contained menace against my person and Hitmouse must have known that it would be taken seriously.

The judge also cast doubt on his "claim" that he was not refering to me at all but to a barbecue that was to take place at Badfort later that evening. "I woz merely refering to a chicken kebab I intended to prepare for the feast, yus honor!" Hitmouse argued "My life had been made a misery by a particularly truculent chicken that was always telling me wot to do and I intended to char-grill him!" he added.

It did not help his case when it was revealed that the chicken in question had been stolen from Farmer Butterskin Mute.

The judge called the tweet at the centre of the case,"menacing in its content and obviously so. It could not be more clear. Any ordinary elephant reading this would see it in that way and be alarmed."

Representing Hitmouse, Beaver Hateman then argued the defence that the tweet in question was merely part and parcel of the defendants job as a revolutionary anarchist and therefore could not be seen as any more menacing than everyday statements made in the pursuit of his chosen career.

When this did not wash with the Judge, Beaver then claimed that "It was an ill-conceived attempt at humour, m'lud, you should just tell him off for being stupid...", however, before he could continue with his argument, Hitmouse became enraged at being called stupid and skewered Hateman.

The Badfort Crowd then started fighting amongst each over and the trial was adjourned.


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