I have been far too busy with matters of state to pen any missives in the interwebnet !
However, I felt I must refute the libellous claims made by the Badfort News in regard to an incident that took place, last week, when I was visiting the King of the Badgers.
It is claimed that, as I was cycling out of the Palace Gate, a policeman attempted to make me ride through the pedestrian gates.
I am purported to have shouted "Best you learn your bloomin' place, you don't run this bloomin' government, you bloomin pleb!" and then knocked his cap off.
Utter nonsense!
I know the PC Brock very well. He is a keen gardener.
What I actually said was:
"Bet you yearn for blooming plants !"
Then, on seeing that he was directing me to the pedestrian gate, I shouted "I won't ruin this blooming Govermint" as I assumed he wished me to avoid the Govermint tree he had planted by the main entrance as decoration.
I stuck out my hand to indicate a left turn and accidently knocked his cap off, and therefore shouted "Oh your tumbling plibe!"
Which everyone knows is the nickname that I use for the hats of the constabulary.
I have donated a large number of bedding plants to the police house garden and P.C. Brock has apologised to me. Apparently, he has a hearing problem and had forgotten to wear his hearing aid that day.
That is an end of the matter.
