Tuesday, 4 May 2010

Make Do and Mend



It seems that Alonzo S. Whitebeard's manifesto for The Badgertown Council Election has struck a chord with the populace.

It would be wrong of me, as the richest elephant in the world and an international celebrity, to try and influence your vote.

However, let us consider the options. Gordon 'Fudge' Brownie has inadvertently let slip in a microphone incident that he thinks badgers are 'a bit smelly'. Whilst we all like to see the human side of our politicians, this remark makes him untenable as the Mayor of Badgertown.

Dave "the biscuit" Macaroon is very charming, however, one cannot in all conciousness vote for a robot. His mechanical nature was revealed yesterday, when his personality chip fell out and he started repetitively intoning "Change...Change...Change..."
He then started fizzing and his skin, which had always looked a bit smooth and plastic, started to melt.

Nick 'Cream' Custard had seemed like a good bet. However, his policy of letting the dwarfs stay in Badgertown, once they have finished digging burrows for the badgers, has not met favour with the voters.

Now, I do find Alonzo's miserliness a tad annoying. I find his jealousy of my vast wealth and his constant scrimping and moaning burdensome. However, his ideas on fiscal policy are clearly what is needed in Badgertown to kerb the Badger King's constant borrowing - from me!

So, without intending to influence your vote, I say Make Do and Mend!

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