Tuesday, 2 September 2008

On being an entrepreneur

Mrs Slocombe said...

Worked hard doing what exactly sir? There seems to be, if not dissimulation, an elision between borrowing a bicycle and being a gazillionaire......

Entrepreneurship is often difficult and tricky, and extremely hard work. My passion for successful outcomes leads me to spending much time organising the available resources (mainly the dwarfs and my many properties) in new and more valuable ways.

If it were not for my huge abilities in this field I would never have been able to pay back the owner of the bicycle, which, I once, in my callow youth, appropriated for my own temporary use.

I think that a cheque for £2,000, six hundred casks of herrings, a thousand kegs of Turkish Delight, and fifty thousand first grade cheeses are hardly to be sneezed at.

In fact, he is constantly trying to persuade me to borrow his bike again.

Of all my great works I am most proud of the architectural projects I have sponsored.

Below you can see how this rather dreary Art Deco building has been tastefully modernised from a debauched place for the excessive consumption of alcohol into a branch of the Uncle chain of teashops.


  1. Truly your trunk is everywhere, sir. But we have something of an infinite regress do we not? How did you come by (a) the many properties and (b) the services of the dwarfs, to whom, presumably, you were unable to pay a fair and equitable wage when you were a callow youth?
    You may not be aware that the building immediately behind your tea house is in fact a house of ill repute called The Scarlet Lady. Hardly a family environment.

  2. Dear Mrs Slocombe,

    Really, I cannot be expected to use this blog to teach people entrepreneurship - suffice to say, great oaks from little acorns grow.

    If you really want to achieve the business heights that I have, I suggest that you take a look at my website for budding entrepreneurs.


    I am appalled to hear of this house of ill repute. I shall ask the Chief of Badgertown Police to raid the place immediately and then buy the property under compulsory purchase. I think that it would make a good location for a Temperance Hall.

    Yours Faithfully


    P.S. How is your pussy?