Another Bicycle Incident !

I have been far too busy with matters of state to pen any missives in the interwebnet !

However, I felt I must refute the libellous claims made by the Badfort News in regard to an incident that took place, last week, when I was visiting the King of the Badgers.

It is claimed that, as I was cycling out of the Palace Gate, a policeman attempted to make me ride through the pedestrian gates.

I am purported to have shouted "Best you learn your bloomin' place, you don't run this bloomin' government, you bloomin pleb!" and then knocked his cap off.

Utter nonsense!

I know the PC Brock very well. He is a keen gardener.

What I actually said was:

"Bet you yearn for blooming plants !"

Then, on seeing that he was directing me to the pedestrian gate, I shouted "I won't ruin this blooming Govermint" as I assumed he wished me to avoid the Govermint tree he had planted by the main entrance as decoration.

I stuck out my hand to indicate a left turn and accidently knocked his cap off, and therefore shouted "Oh your tumbling plibe!" 

Which everyone knows is the nickname that I use for the hats of the constabulary.

I have donated a large number of bedding plants to the police house garden and P.C. Brock has apologised to me. Apparently, he has a hearing problem and had forgotten to wear his hearing aid that day.

That is an end of the matter.