The Badfort News is one of a number of newspapers to have advance sight of the 250,000 US State Department classified documents released by the whistle-blower website Wikileaks.
I am absolutely livid at the criticism levelled at myself in some of these cables.
President Obama is supposed to have described me as "a bit pompous and overbearing"!!
Another states"he has an over inflated opinion of his own importance on the world stage"!!!
The material includes a reference to me as "over indulgent - he sure has a big appetite! we ordered in two crates of bananas for one state banquet and he ate the lot!"!!!!
One cable records that during a meeting in January with President Obama, I supposedly implied that a loan to his financially beleaguered company would be dependent upon a rather unusual favour in return:
"I have always fancied my head carved into Mount Rushmore" I am supposed to have said.
Sheer nonsense! This was entirely Mister Obama's suggestion!
In one missive they even have the audacity to criticise royalty - The King of the Badgers no less!
They claim that he 'behaved inappropriately' when President Obama visited Homeward. It seems that:
"The King told the President that he was a bit strapped for cash and asked if he might lend him a few thousand until 'Unc' stumped up another loan"
This is the thanks I get for saving the world from financial ruin!!!
I suspect that this is all because of my speech to congress and my statement that "There are occasions when elephants in Homeward would wish that those in responsible positions in the US might listen and learn from our experiences."
The United Staes catapulted into a worldwide diplomatic crisis today, but nothing will worry them more than the fact that they no longer have a friend in Uncle.