Monday, 7 March 2011

Prince of Badgers Row

I have had to sack the King of the Badger's son from his role as trade envoy for Homeward.

"I am afraid you have now just become a national embarrassment !" I told him after giving him a good ticking off!

It transpires that he has got into some very murky deals with a "notorious" member of a gang of ferrets, took a holiday with a infamous 'Black Tom' smuggler and even used an official trip to find an unsuspecting buyer for his appalling set. Rundown, and with most of its tunnels collapsing, it appears the hapless purchaser has paid well over the odds!

Eyebrows have also been raised in some quarters about his diplomacy style.

Now, most badgers are proud, hot-tempered, and fond of simple pleasures. They are fond of feasting, sparring, sailing, and drinking (often all at the same time). They are highly acquisitive, yet notoriously frugal. Boastful creatures, they are fond of tall tales and one-upsmanship. It seems, however, that the Prince has taken these traits to extremes.

One ambassador described him as "cocky" and "rude".

What was he thinking!

I only gave him the job because his father begged me. He had tried to find a role for the Prince in the Badgertown Navy. It only had one boat - patrolling the Badgertown Park Lake. However, it sank after he 'accidently' rammed a rowing boat full of anti-monarchist dwarfs.

It appears that HBH, His Badger Highness, has become known as His Buffoon Highness in diplomatic circles.

I shall have a lot of work to do repairing the damage he has done to my reputation around the world!

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