#TwitRelief

The King of the Badgers asked me if I would be willing to take part in Cosmic Relief.

He is trying to raise 10 billion pounds to go to the moon! Of course, I have already been there a number of times and we have a colony of dwarfs on the moon.

But the King is keen to have his own colony of badgers there. I think he will be lucky to raise the money, myself, given the usual parlous state of his finances.

Anyway I am doing my bit by selling myself on TwitRelief. Bids have already reached over £ 5 million! Click on the image above to see!

I think that Barack is bidding for the American government - he is desperate to have a meeting with me about the World situation.

Part of the money raised is supposed to help impoverished young badgers (as a sop to those who complain that it is silly to spend money going to the moon when the economic situation in Badgertown is so bad) and the King of the Badgers has come under some flack for employing interns, with no pay, on Cosmic Relief. "Why not employ some poor youths, and give them a chance on the career ladder - rather than the sons and daughters of the rich who can afford to work for nothing and boost their CV's!" they cry.

The King of the Badgers is furious! "What other job can I give the Prince!" he moaned to me "No one would pay him to make the mess of things he does!, anyway I don't want a lot of scruffy cubs around!"