Last night, whilst on a visit to the King of the Badgers, a man in a wheelchair hurtled towards me and ran over my foot!
I was in fear for my life!
Luckily, a vigilant member of the Badgertown Police bravely dragged my attacker from his lethal weapon and threw him to the ground.
It transpired that he was merely an autograph hunter, but in these times of unrest in Badgertown one cannot take chances - anyway, one should not go around dressed in sackcloth if one does not want to be mistaken for a member of the Badfort Crowd. He could well have been Beaver Hateman in one of his nefarious disguises!