Saturday 17 September 2022

Hitmouse van Gogh

In my last blog, you will recall, I purchased a painting by Hitmouse for an exorbitant amount. The only reason I paid so much money for it was in an attempt to enable the ne'er do wells from Badfort to pay off their loan from Badgertown Rock. As it turns out I should have kept my money in my wallet because the eccentric art connoisseur Charley Scratchy paid Hitmouse £200,000 for his hut! It was a pretty awful abstract self portrait but we decided to hang it in the Rogues Gallery anyway. It was pretty badly stained with mildew and the like, from Hitmouse's hut, so we decided to clean it up using Gleamhound's Dirt-Producer for Enemies. As you will be aware, Gleamhound's stuff works backwards and so we knew that this concoction would do a restorative job. Waldovenison Smeare carefully wiped the fluid across the painting... ....but clearly Hitmouse had only used a cheap emulsion because in a few moments another image began to be revealed beneath his own handiwork..... We could not believe our eyes. "By Jove !" cried out Smeare "It looks like a van Gogh!" Whitebeard fainted again. Indeed, it did turn out to be a lost masterpiece by that great artist - valued at £1,000,000. Hitmouse, not realising it's worth, had just painted over an old canvas to save money. Not such a bad buy after all. So, never let it be said that a good deed is not rewarded.

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