As you can imagine, using a mobile phone is problematic for an elephant.
I'm all fingers and thumbs when it comes to their operation. They have got such fiddly little buttons.
Luckily, Cowgill has come up with a brilliant high tech solution. It is a phone with a trunk sensitive screen which he calls the ephone (e standing for elephant, of course). It is a very clever device that can take pictures, receive television and connect to the interweb. All at the brush of a trunk.
Also it is clockwork so one never needs to worry about battery life.
It is quite bulky because my trunk is quite large but it provides gainful employment for Whitebeard who transports it everywhere I go in a wheelbarrow and keeps it wound up.
You may be wondering how I can allow myself to be distracted by this new electronic toy when I should be planning a counter strike against the Badfort Crowd to retrieve my gold.
Well, Cowgill has another ingenious device that may well provide a solution to the Hateman problem.