Saturday 17 September 2022

The Lost Clinkers Cooling Tower

Cooling towers are heat removal devices used to transfer process waste heat to the atmosphere. The Cooling Tower at Lost Clinkers is a large hyperboloid structure that is 200 metres tall and 100 metres in diameter and used to be part of the Power Station supplied by the Gasworks. I am keen to pull the whole thing down and replace it with a big new skyscraper. I do like skyscrapers. Skyscrapers embody many things, including technical achievement, economic prosperity, and civic and corporate pride. Homeward, centre of economic activity and capital of culture, is unimaginable without skyscrapers. They are as thrilling as the ecclesiastical towers and steeples of medieval Europe. I would build the tallest skyscraper in Homeward on this site – furthermore it will have Giant propellers, like those of wind turbines, set into or on to the tower. Thus, the new building will carry on the previous function of the old power station and cooling tower – supplying Homeward with electricity. But there are always some who want to stand in the way of progress. Unfortunately, The Cooling Tower at Lost Clinkers has divided opinion at Homeward. Many agree with me that it should come down but others see it as a local landmark and have started up a campaign to “Save our Tower”. It is quite infuriating ! All this fuss over a crumbling relic of industry best demolished. They have even organised a competition for ideas on how the Cooling Tower could be reused. Here are some of them - and I have to say they are pretty far-fetched. As for the Badfort Crowd’s idea, well, not surprisingly, it is an absolute disgrace. To make matters worse the Heritage brigade have stuck a preservation order on the Cooling Tower – insisting that the strange natural phenomena that occurs at the top of it needs to be investigated first. They argue that the strange spiraling vortex of blue mist, that can be seen when one looks up, is unique and has not been seen before. To me this odd anomaly is clearly merely condensation of some kind and I aim to prove this. I am going to lead an expedition into the mist to take samples. Once I have proven the pedestrian nature of this gas – the tower shall come down! Picture of The Strange Phenomena

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