Tuesday, 11 November 2008

I am not a number

Beaver has insisted that, here in the village, we are now to be known by the numbers on our new identity cards. I, apparently, am Number 6.

Not only that, he is insisting that we all have to wear blazers.

Actually, they are rather smart and I think that I look quite elegant in mine.

Hitmouse called me to attend the Town Hall.

"Why did you resign?" he asked.

"I did not resign, I was deposed. I see you are Number 2 - who might I ask is Number 1?" I replied.

At this point a rather silly round chair swung around to reveal...Beaver!

"You were Number 1...now I'm the Boss!" he cackled.

He swiveled round and round in his chair like a demented fool.

"What do you think of the new uniform?" he inquired.

"Sartorial it is very becoming - the villagers needed smartening up a bit.... personally I would have preferred purple to black. Why have you asked me here?" I replied.

"We want information. Information!" shouted Beaver.

"What kind of information?" I said.

"Well, financial, actually...we were wondering if you could give us a bit of advice on investments?...this capitalism lark is all a bit new to us, Number 6, whereas you've been exploiting people and indulging in dodgy financial...."

"Stop right there!" I shouted "I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed, or numbered. My life is my own... I am not a number. I am a free elephant."

At this, I stomped out.

Be seeing you.


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