Saturday, 17 September 2022

Uncleville

Oh Calamitous Day! We were awoken this morning by the sound of bangs and crashes from without the walls of Homeward. The Old Monkey, Brass, Goodman, the One-Armed Badger and I went to investigate. Beaver and his cronies have constructed a shanty town on the lawns of Homeward! If you remember, the Badfort Crowd still owe the considerable sum of £200,000 to Badgertown Rock, following its collapse in 2007. They had mortgaged Badfort to build a 'People's Palace'. It appears that the King of the Badgers has had enough of their non-payment and foreclosed on the property. In retaliation, Beaver took the place apart - leaving the King of the Badgers with an empty plot of land. The Badfort Crowd have re-used the bits of old wood to construct this monstrosity on my doorstep! We were confronted by the sight of ramshackle sheds, jerry-built shacks, tents and Nissen huts. They have built residences out of box wood, cardboard, and scraps of metal! They have even had the cheek to name this shanty town 'Uncleville' - blaming me for the present depression! The ingratitude! - after all I have done to alleviate the economic downturn. This could all be very embarrassing - I must find a way to dispose of this eyesore before my good friend Barack comes here on his first foreign visit. <

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