Saturday, 17 September 2022

I think I fancy Boris - not me of course

Everybody seems to be writing songs about, Mayoral Candidate, Boris Badger. This is an odd one though - the more I have heard this song, supposedly a Paean to Boris penned by a love-stricken Badger, the more I detect the hand of Hitmouse. When I see those ruddy red cheeks Blonde floppy hair My knees go weak An old Liarian who’s down with the streets I think your jolly nice When they said you were running for Mayor I felt it pertinent to declare That dwarf lover Ken does not compare I love your hair I think I fancy Boris You mumble when you debate But its 2008 Who needs a competent candidate? You think that dwarfs are too short But you’re a really nice bloke Badgertown needs you I think I fancy Boris You mumble when you debate But its 2008 Who needs a competent candidate? You’ll get tough on the Badfort Crowd Drag the dwarfs into line Better looking than Ken I think I fancy Boris May the first is your date And you think snuffling for mushrooms is really great Ban bendy buses and focus on beating the Badfort Crowd Think Badgertown, be mine Noble, brave, there is no doubt That the goat will soon be out I think I fancy Boris You mumble when you debate But its 2008 Who needs a competent candidate? You edited Badger News Got dissed by Beaver Hateman It is never too soon To elect a buffoon Boris you make me swoon I think I fancy Boris You mumble when you debate But its 2008 Who needs a competent candidate? Meanwhile, I have had to bail out the King of the Badgers, again, over that Badgertown Rock farrago. I have made it quite clear that I will be most unhappy if Noddy Ninety is not the next Mayor of Badgertown.

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